MY PACKETS ARE SO BIG THEY NEED THEIR OWN ZIP CODE  ///  TCP WALKS INTO A BAR AND SAYS I WANT A BEER. BARTENDER: YOU WANT A BEER? TCP: YES, A BEER. BARTENDER: OK HERE IS A BEER. TCP: THANK YOU  ///  UDP WALKS INTO A BAR. NO ONE ACKNOWLEDGES HIM  ///  JUMBO FRAMES: FOR WHEN REGULAR PACKETS ARE TOO BASIC  ///  MY THROUGHPUT IS LIKE MY LOVE LIFE - THEORETICALLY UNLIMITED BUT PERPETUALLY BOTTLENECKED  ///  LAYER 8 ERROR: PROBLEM EXISTS BETWEEN KEYBOARD AND CHAIR  ///  MY MTU IS 9000 BECAUSE I REFUSE TO FRAGMENT  ///  I PING MY EX. REQUEST TIMED OUT. STORY OF MY LIFE  ///  DNS: DID NOT STUDY  ///  OSPF: OH SERIOUSLY PACKETS FALL?  ///  BGP TAKES 90 SECONDS TO CONVERGE. BGP NEVER CHANGES  ///  MY JITTER IS SO BAD MY VOIP CALLS SOUND LIKE JAZZ  ///  HALF DUPLEX: FOR PEOPLE WHO CANNOT HANDLE REAL CONVERSATIONS  ///  STP: SLOWLY TORMENTING PEOPLE SINCE 1985  ///  MY PACKETS ARE SO BIG THEY NEED THEIR OWN ZIP CODE  ///  TCP WALKS INTO A BAR AND SAYS I WANT A BEER. BARTENDER: YOU WANT A BEER? TCP: YES, A BEER. BARTENDER: OK HERE IS A BEER. TCP: THANK YOU  ///  UDP WALKS INTO A BAR. NO ONE ACKNOWLEDGES HIM  ///  JUMBO FRAMES: FOR WHEN REGULAR PACKETS ARE TOO BASIC  ///